Hearing your spouse say the words, “I want a divorce,” is one of the most difficult and emotional moments anyone can experience. Even if you agree with the decision, it’s natural to feel overwhelmed, hurt, or even panicked.
But how you handle these first steps can significantly impact the outcome of your divorce and your future. At Lincolnton Family Law, we understand the emotional toll of this process and we want to make sure your response and actions will protect you in court. Here’s what you should do if your spouse has asked for a divorce.
Stay Calm and Control Your Emotions
Your initial reaction might involve anger, sadness, or even desperation. While these feelings are valid, it’s important to stay as calm as possible. Reacting impulsively, whether through harsh words, rash decisions, or emotional outbursts, can complicate the immediate situation and harm your case later on.
Take a mental step back to process your emotions privately or with the help of a therapist. It’s important to note that staying calm isn’t about suppressing your feelings, it’s about making decisions with a clear head and focusing on what’s best for your future.
Think Before You Act
You’ve likely heard the phrase “think before you speak”, but it’s the same for your actions. Divorce can feel urgent, but it’s rarely a race. Instead of rushing into decisions, take the time to think through each step carefully. Consider:
Your Financial Situation
Gather important financial documents, such as bank statements, tax returns, and mortgage papers. Understanding your assets and liabilities will help you prepare for property division, which follows the principle of equitable distribution under North Carolina law.
Your Living Arrangements
Will you stay in the marital home, or will one of you move out? Have you already been separated? Avoid making hasty moves before consulting with an attorney, as this decision can affect your case.
Your Children’s Well-Being
If you have children, their stability and safety should be the top of your priorities. Work toward a custody arrangement that minimizes disruption to their routines and allows them to see both parents, if safe. Like most states, North Carolina courts prioritize the best interests of the child when making custody decisions.
Don’t hesitate: Consult a Lawyer Immediately
While you may feel tempted to handle things independently, having an experienced divorce lawyer by your side as soon as possible can help you achieve the best possible outcome. Divorce involves numerous legal steps, from filing documents to attending court hearings. Also, a divorce lawyer provides a calm, objective perspective to help you make sound decisions without the emotional attachment.
Avoid Acting Out of Revenge
Decisions driven by revenge, like emptying joint bank accounts, or speaking negatively about your spouse to your children, friends, family, or even on social media, can backfire horribly.
North Carolina courts value cooperation and fairness. Acting out of spite could harm your credibility in the eyes of the court and lead to unfavorable outcomes. Instead, focus on working towards a resolution that benefits everyone involved and protects you, and in particular your children if they are part of the equation.
Plan for the Future
Divorce may end a marriage, but it also provides opportunities for new beginnings. It may feel daunting or even like the world is ending now, but try to think of this process as an opportunity to rebuild your life on your own terms. Take this time to focus on your emotional and physical well-being by seeking support from friends, family, or a counselor.
Let Lincolnton Family Law Help You
Divorce is challenging, but you don’t have to face it alone. At Lincolnton Family Law, we provide compassionate, skilled representation to guide you through every step of this process. From understanding your rights under North Carolina law to negotiating fair agreements, we’re here to ensure you emerge from this experience with confidence and security.
If your spouse has asked for a divorce, contact us today to schedule a consultation. Together, we’ll navigate the legal and emotional complexities, so you can focus on building the future you deserve.
Why Choose Lincolnton Family Law?
Choosing the right attorney is essential. Jennifer Hames and the team at Lincolnton Family Law bring a compassionate, understanding approach combined with a wealth of experience in family law. We focus on minimizing conflict and resolving issues efficiently to protect your future.
We understand the emotional and financial stresses involved in dealing with the law and court and are committed to making this process as smooth as possible for you and your children. Our local presence in Lincolnton allows us to be accessible when you need us, providing timely and effective legal solutions.
Navigating court doesn’t have to be a journey you take alone. Contact Lincolnton Family Law today, and let us help you ensure the best for you.
